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Until cis people — especially heteronormative men — are able to interrogate their own toxic masculinity and realize their own gender performance is literally killing trans women, cis men will continue to persecute trans women and blame them for their own deaths.
If you think trans women should disclose and “be honest,” then why don’t you work on making the damn world safe for us to exist in the first place?
Put that damn book down,” Duval demands.“Tell me she ain’t pretty,” Charlamagne pushes. That nigga doing his thing….ain’t finna get me.”The hosts laugh after using my image as a literal prop — just days after I was a guest on the same show — for laughs, vitriol, and a deeper call and justification for violence.
It’s this deplorable rhetoric that leads many cis men, desperately clutching their heterosexuality, to yell at, kick, spit on, shoot, burn, stone, and kill trans women of color.
It’s something I’ve written about extensively and even explored in my conversation with actress Amiyah Scott, who lost her sister Chyna Gibson when she was shot to death in New Orleans in February. There have been at least 15 reported deaths of trans women of color so far this year, according to GLAAD.
Yet I was hopeful that I could use the show’s vast platform to speak directly to their predominantly black and Latinx listeners, who are often excluded from the conversations held in mainstream LGBT spaces (which are largely white, moneyed, and concerned with the centering of cis folk).
I hoped I could make listeners aware of the lived realities of their trans sisters, and let them know that we deserve to be seen, heard, and acknowledged without the threat of harassment, exclusion, and violence.
The effort can detract from our work to protect and liberate ourselves.
Yet I also know that black and Latina trans women often live in communities of color, so outreach to viewers of color, from , which is about the years in my life I decided to keep my trans-ness private — largely in order to gain access and maintain my safety.
My ultimate goal was to be accessible — to not judge, to call in rather than call out, and, above all, to exercise patience as the (straight cis male) hosts processed my existence.
It’s rare that I do Trans 101 lecturing anymore, because I’ve already done that work with my first book, , which was filled with plain speak and explanatory commas about definitions, statistics, and context.
I was not naïve when I entered the Tri Be Ca studio of “The Breakfast Club,” a hip-hop radio show that bills itself as “the world’s most dangerous morning show,” hosted by Angela Yee, Charlamagne tha God, and DJ Envy, on July 18.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating